The High Order of Realist can be summed up as this: "We care, just not about religion." ~Penguin 41:07

These are the ways of the High Order of Realists:

Where is Realism? It's on your face:

"Realism is a mask. It's on your face. View the world through our eye holes and your peripheral vision into the realm of religion is cut off. So who cares what's there if you can't see it, right?" ~Penguin 7:47

The Apocalypse:

"When arrows scroll by, it's a sign of the Apocalypse, so we must dance on mystical floor pads of doom in order to save the world." ~Penguin 8:59

Food:

"Eating ramen is a sign of good health and prosperity." ~Penguin 9:33
"Only realists, however, realize the reason for ramen's immense benefits... which is... because we said so. =P" ~Penguin 9:9-16

"Ring Dings are AWESOME" ~Penguin 9:48
"...they [ring dings] are a sacred food... and must only be eaten if no other food is available." ~Penguin 10:18-25

The Great Cube:

"The solving of the cube is a sign of good fortune, and should be performed often." ~Squishy 35:44

Terminology:

"From henceforth till forever, the word 'zealous' when used in any realistic context should thereby and wherefore be known as carrying the definitive meaning of 'tasty ziti', as in accordance with the law of henceforth therefore fortnight compound word realism." ~Penguin 48:48

"The word 'fruck', having been confirmed in conference, in accordance with the Law of Anterior Conference of Original Diction and Definition, shall be henceforth known to have the definition of 'to give Twinkies'. In appropriate context, it may also possess an indirect object notation, altering the definition to 'to give Twinkies to'." ~Penguin 21:3

Laws:

"The Great Law of Henceforth Therefore Fortnight Compound Word Realism states that the High Order of Realists reserve the exclusive right to redefine any one word as meaning the collective of two words, so long as the official definition is preceded by two predefined compound words; the words in the name of this Law are considered applicable and acceptable examples of such predefined compound words." ~Penguin 59:59

Law of Anterior Conference of Original Diction and Definition -- "It will be allowable for Realists to create and define new words, having properly confirmed with at least one other Realist (and/or one of the creators of Realism) that the word to be defined is not already a meaningful word, and that the definition for the word is suitable for the word. And all will rejoice." ~Penguin 54:25-29